Low

Tonight is a low night. I’ve held on pretty well all day, but now I’m tired and my resolve is gone. I feel lousy and I look worse. Self-pity isn’t my goal, I’m just being real.

My muscles are weak, my hands hurt. My feet are numb and I’m achy. I’m on my third nosebleed today. My eyes are weepy but the skin around my eyes is so sensitive that it hurts to wipe them. My face is puffy and swollen, and with my bald head, I look like I’m eighty. I have gained so much weight that I feel awkward and ugly.

My husband is sweet and wants to encourage. “Only three treatments left.” Only three. That means four more weeks of this battle, this fatigue, this feeling like I’ve been run over. I’m over tired, and I know I’ll feel better, at least mentally, tomorrow. But somewhere tonight, there is another woman in my shoes who needs to know she is not alone.

Sister, where we are is an awful place to be. It’s hard, it’s mentally draining, it’s physically demanding, it’s maddening. But it’s temporary. One day, we will be done with all this and look back and not remember how hard it all really was.

For tonight, I’ll fight through and you do the same. We can make it. One foot in front of the other, step after weary step. I won’t give up if you won’t. And though I don’t know you, I know you are out there. I’ll pray for you as I go off to sleep.

We can do this. We have to.

Published by

perfectjourney19

I'm a homeschool mom and the proud wife of a hard working farmer. We live in the sticks and drive 20 miles to a town of any size. I live to serve the One who saved my soul, and He daily loads me with blessings. I started this blog to share my journey through breast cancer. So far, I have only done a few warm up stretches, and I pray I will remain faithful and be an encouragement to others traveling this road with me. I know this journey will be rough, but I also know it will be perfect, because my God does all things well. I am not afraid.

3 thoughts on “Low”

  1. And it came to pass…
    LeAnne Hardy
    l eannehardy@gmail.com Website: http://www.leannehardy.net My blog: Times and Places
    On Thu, Jan 16, 2020 at 11:07 PM A Rough and Perfect Journey wrote:
    > perfectjourney19 posted: ” Tonight is a low night. I’ve held on pretty > well all day, but now I’m tired and my resolve is gone. I feel lousy and I > look worse. Self-pity isn’t my goal, I’m just being real. My muscles are > weak, my hands hurt. My feet are numb and I’m achy. I’m on” >

    Like

  2. And as your Larry is encouraging you , you have been telling me the same thing. We both are on the home stretch. I’m si thankful for you my friend. We got this! Love you.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s